Remember when we moved in together, we divvied up the chores? Well, that wasn't for a hypothetical situation, as in, when hell freezes over. And when you say you'll clean up from dinner (after I made it), and I say I'll help, why is it that I put all the food away, all the dishes in the dishwasher and you put the rice cooker thing in the sink? Are you wondering why it's still there? Are you wondering why the dirty pan is still on the stove? BECAUSE THEY'RE FOR YOU, HONEY. Please don't turn me into a nagging sitcom wife, too. Because I love you very much.

Love, squirrel

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Originally posted by EmmaNadine:
My husband solved this problem by getting me hooked on the games too. Though so far I have managed to keep us from buying World of W@rcraft because I would end up flunking out of school if I owned it.

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Originally posted by chitowngal:
okay what is that EmmaNadine. Would this be a good present for Super T for christmas? Does it have to do with WWII?? I do realize that I may never see him again though...

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It doesn't have anything to do with WWII, it's an MMORPG, or massively multiplayer online roleplaying game for the non-geeky among us. It's in the same school as Everque$t or St@r Wars: G@laxies. You basically have a whole world to play around in, but you're hooked up to the internet, so you're playing with tons of other people. I've played W@rcraft III and it is awesome, and everyone I've talked to about WoW, as it's being called, says it is the best MMORPG out there.

ETA: Go here for the official website to get a better idea of the game.

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Originally posted by chitowngal:
oh yeah he does that too...but with wwII games. Really, what the hell, that was 50 years ago....

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I KNOW that you when you go to work you are there for 24 or so hours...however then you are at HOME for 72 hours, you go to work TWICE a week. I have to go FIVE DAMN DAYS IN A ROW. No, I am not there for 24 hours, but that is FIVE DAYS IN A ROW I have to get my ass up at the butt crack of dawn. FIVE DAYS IN A ROW I have to go deal with people who spend their entire day whining about shit that I don't control. FIVE DAYS IN A ROW I have to leave the house in the cold and drive 40 minutes to work. I go out of my way to make sure the Lobster doesn't wake you up when you are sleeping the day before or the night after you work, I think you could extend me the same courtesy. I know that sometimes she just goes on and on and on, but a. even if you go in there to comfort her, if you leave her door open, its still very very loud and very very much able to wake me up and b. after rocking her for 30 minutes just putting her back to bed cuz you've already rocked her does not help, it does not help me get the sleep I need in order to function the next day and c. if you are warming up a bottle for her, could you at least hold her or something so she stops screaming bloody murder? and d. don't come in and take the frickin remote control and change it to a world war II show. You don't own the remote, sometimes I don't give a crap and would really just like to watch something girlie...and really you don't have to change channels at such a mock speed that it makes me dizzy and want to throw up on you.

I love you dearly, but right now you are driving me insane. I crawled into bed at 9:40, so I could get some sleep, so that I could maybe get rid of this headache I've had since SUNDAY, it is now 11:40 and thanks to your version of taking care of a crying upset Libby I am wide fuc%$ing awake. And you wonder why I'm a grumpy *&%&^ at times!

eta: could you clean the litter boxes without me having to ask you??? That would be nice and then I wouldn't have to get mad at you about madeline peeing on the floor THAT WE DON'T OWN.

I don't understand why you feel as though you must consult me on every decision, no matter how minor. I cook almost every single night of the week, so if you get home before me, why don't you start dinner. "I didn't know what you wanted to eat" is not an excuse. I make that decision all the time without knowing what you want to eat, so just make a decision and I'm sure it will be fantastic!

You are a bad driver. You need to drive more and get more practice. Plus, if people cut you off or do stupid stuff, please don't throw a hissy fit. It's going to happen practically every time you drive for the rest of the days you live in DC, so might as well get used to it and not let it raise you blood pressure 30 points.

If you ever, I mean EVER, take the paper towels from the kitchen, WHERE THEY BELONG, and leave them somewhere else in the house, I will KILL YOU. I don't know how many times I have to ask. I will really tattoo this one across your arm if you let me.

You are a big baby sometimes. When we both had achy joints from that weird cold, all you did was bitch bitch bitch. I was lucky enough to have it first, and I admit it was bad, but you made me bring you heating pads in bed.

Quit buying dress clothes that are too big for you and then getting mad at me when you ask me what I think and I tell you they are too big for you. Try things on in the store, genius.

Remember that filing cabinet I got from Fran? Remember the trouble I went to painstakingly label folders, print out stickers from work, and then putting all in the proper order? Why don't you file bills there after they're paid, as opposed to me finding them under your desk, wondering if they were ever paid? And I'll be damned if I'm going to keep opening YOUR three-week old bank statement so I can briefly check it over (like I would recognize any mistakes anyway) and file it in its proper folder. If you do all your banking business online anyway, then JUST THROW THE STATEMENTS AWAY!

It makes me madder than I can possibly express when you tell me I am working too much. Number one, you are the one who is constantly staying late, which cuts into dinner time. Number two, we are just starting off in our own home, and we need to make a little dough! We share pretty much everything (financially) these days, but I haven't noticed you offering to help pay my blinding student loans from grad school. I took that part time teaching job because I thought it would be something I'd enjoy and the money was excellent. We all thought it was a brilliant idea at the time, so don't rub it in my face that it turned out not to be so great (and I'm under contract so you KNOW I can't quit).

Please just do some housework without me having to ask. I fully believe that you are an intelligent person with good vision and sense of smell, which leads me to believe that you should know when things are dirty. You know, for instance that I hate it when the basin is dirty in the bathroom. I have made it as easy as possible by leaving a sponge in the vanity, and I wipe it down after brushing my teeth. Can you do the same after you shave? Also, the stove needs to be wiped down after EVERY use, not just when it gets really disgusting.

I've actually scheduled some time off from work next week that I haven't told him about. I don't want him to know until the last minute, where he won't be able to schedule that time off and sabotage my plans. Just need him out of my hair for a while. I'll have the remote. I'll have peace and quiet and the house will remain clean for the period of time I'm there.

[This message has been edited by Neopolitan (edited 12-12-2004).]

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Originally posted by Neopolitan:
And don't flip the channel when you come into the room. Yes, I WANTED TO WATCH THAT and NOT the HISTORY channel.

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH....I am going to find a way to ban the History Channel from our cable!

So, the other day I opened the paper and found this as the entirety of one of the letters to the editor:

"If P & G really wanted to arouse women's passions, they would have invented a patch that caused men to wash the dishes, vacuum the house and do a little laundry."

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Originally posted by tippygee:

"If P & G really wanted to arouse women's passions, they would have invented a patch that caused men to wash the dishes, vacuum the house and do a little laundry."

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Tee hee.

Seriously though, I do love my boy and I know he does do stuff around the house. Last time I complained about housework he mentioned all the handy things he does, like fixing the leaky faucet and nailing back the toe kick on the baseboards. But I think a lot of the problem is that a lot of what I (and a lot of my fellow Digsters) do is a TON of stuff that goes unnoticed. For instance, we went to a party on Saturday night. It was a Christmas party, so everyone was supposed to bring ornaments. Z would of course never have thought to do go out and buy the ornaments, so I ended up having to do it. It's like that kind of thing gets automatically delegated to me... Also, we had run into our hosts a week earlier and asked if we could bring something to eat, since we love to cook. They said "Sure! We love everything you guys make at your parties, so just bring anything appetizer-ish." So Z and I planned to bring hummus and pita chips, and a black bean mango salsa. Now of course, this was something we decided on together, but Z never even offered to help, never even had a second thought about it. I think it just doesn't even occur to him that he might offer to help. ARG! And making dinner. Saturday and Sunday nights are the only nights we're home together at dinner-making time (and I make dinner basically every other night of the week since I get home earlier than he does). Last night we went to an art show in the evening, and when we got back we were both really hungry. So what does he do? "What's for dinner?" and goes to play with the dog. He know I love to cook, and that's absolutely true, but it would be nice to get an offer once in a while to give me a break!

The other day the dog peed on the bed, so Z took all the sheets and comforter and mattress pad down to the basement and treated it with that dog-pee enzyme stuff, which was nice, but meanwhile, there was a half a load of whites in the washing machine with the perfect amount of room for say, a mattress pad, all ready to go. Why oh why didn't he just put the mattress pad in the machine, add soap and go? I think he's laundry retarded, I really do. And then he had the nerve to put his OWN sweater in the dryer the other day-- it shrank a LITTLE TEENY bit, and he got SO mad at me for laughing at him. He's like, "Did this go in the dryer? What happened?!"

Also, don't complain about my car being a POS if the reason you're driving it is b/c your precious car can't be driven on snowy roads. It snowed an inch three days ago, snow pansy! They make these cars in Germany. It snows there!

This isn't the schedule you expected - gosh, how the hell can you whine about not going to the gym each morning when 100,000 people just were washed away, you whiny little child?

I can't complain about my SO too much at the moment as he has done an amazing amount of carrying, carting, lugging and ferrying of *my* stuff around the house, as well as cleaning up the jungle we had for a front yard and back yard until, oh, this week.

ditto on the mumbling all the time...

when you irresponsibly let the car insurance lapse and I scold you about it, don't "lecture" me back by saying that I don't know shit about insurance, because 1) that's not true 2) it's mean.

When you let the car tag lapse, don't complain about my unwillingness to drive the car.

Maybe YOU could do a load or three of laundry? Especially since we need more clean towels and socks?

When I clean off the desk and the table, please help me keep it clean longer than 3 hours, and don't pile crap on top of them and then complain about it being there. It's so annoying.

Maybe, just maybe, could YOU wash the dishes? I hate it too, baby, but I don't like doing it all the time...

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Originally posted by Eckerslie:
Bwahahahaha - that's too funny. Kind of makes up for it, huh ?

I can't complain about my SO too much at the moment as he has done an amazing amount of carrying, carting, lugging and ferrying of *my* stuff around the house, as well as cleaning up the jungle we had for a front yard and back yard until, oh, this week.

But I can complain about one thing - when I go into my room, put on the computer, put on the radio to that annoying station of continual news that drives you bananas and shut the door, that means I want to be alone. We've just moved in together and have spent the past *week* in each other's pocket so git. Do not come and fuss on the computer, chat to me, ask me where things are or want to play - I said git!!

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Just moved in with mine too..I think there's just like, this "gettin' used to eachother" period. This better be temporary!

BTW: Boys' still being a boring-a$$-d!ck!
It's been 3 days now!!!~~~He's usually very, cute to me no matter what, lately he's just cute when the pants are off~~~

Dear sweety - if you don't want me to be grumpy, please don't keep me out until midnight on a school night. I am tired, have pms and haven't taken my sups this week so I'm not my normal chipper self so midnight is not a good time to keep me out.

Honey, I really need to talk to you about this. It's becoming a huge issue for me, and the fact that I can't seem to talk to you about it is only making things worse. I need you to be able to listen to me and accept what I'm saying without getting pouty and over-reacting and laying the monster guilt trip on me (which I don't know if it's real or just your way of dealing with things.) I'm not blaming you or criticizing you, I'm simply asking you to slightly change a behaviour which is really wearing on our marriage.

Edit: Okay, so we talked and he reacted as positively as I could have expected and now I feel like a b*tch for writing this without giving him a chance! Dang.

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Originally posted by meggo:
Sweetie - I would be really nice if you appreciated the fact that I cook dinner nearly every night rather than always say "You really need to learn to cook with spices. Your food is too bland."

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Boy used to have a habit of saying, EVERY TIME, after I cooked something particularly ambitious that I don't usually make (I don't like to cook much, and when I do, it's usually something quick/frozen, cause HEY, I just got home from work too, and SURPRISE SURPRISE, I don't feel like cooking!) "Next time you should do __________" or "next time you should use less _______" or "more _______" to which I always responded "next time you can do it yer damn SELF and then you can do it however you WANT." Seriously, I'm open to suggestion, but a "hey, thanks for cooking" before you let fly with the criticism would be nice.

First of all - cooking. I cook dinner nearly every night. I'm trying to expand my cooking horizons slightly - not to include odd food items - but just to have more recipes in my arsenal. So - I made smoked turkey black bean soup on Saturday. He didn't like it. So he started talking about how he wanted cereal. I said "You know - everytime I cook - you don't like it. You tell me it's too bland (because it doesn't taste like fake cheez & pepper)."

So then yesterday - he wanted to go watch football at the bar. I said I'd like to go, he tried to find some guys to go with him (apparently drinking beers and watching football at that bar with the owls is not as fun with your wife). I said "But I want to stop at the office supply place before we go. It's on the way." I even offered to drive separately. No no - that was fine, we could stop.
So we pulled into the bar first - I said "Hey - I need to go to the store & they close at 5. Are we going to be done here by 5? Can we go to the office place first?"
He said we were just going to go to the office place and then go home because this was clearly my attempt at forcing him to go shopping.
Um - what? I am forcing you to go shopping? At an office supply store where I'm buying notebooks?

Fine - so whatever. I go in, buy the books, come out and he's in a fine mood again - so we can go to the bar.

In any case - I went to bed at 11 last night. As usual, I went downstairs to say goodnight to him, tell him to come to bed - and he said "Oh yeah, I'll be right up." Yeah - not. He started snoring again.
You know - if he had to watch X program when it came on - I could understand his tv watching. I have to watch L&O - I can relate to having shows you want to see.
But he will watch anything. Anything that moves. Something on space, on waves, on buildings, on sports, anything that is a cartoon - he doesn't care. Anything that moves across the screen.
And he'll completely zone out while the tv is on.

If I did ANYTHING with the regularity and passion that he watches tv - he'd tell me I was obsessed.

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Originally posted by crowjoy:
Meggo, try hiding things under the cushion of the couch.

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Do not let mail pile up on your desk for the better part of a year. You WILL miss something important, and we will end up having to pay fines and late fees or have a shoddier credit rating because of it.

When I ask you to take care of it, or even offer to do it for you, do not get mad at me. When you finally get around to it, do not act like you've undertaken some herculean feat of organizational prowess.

Try dealing with each piece of mail as it comes in. You'll notice that the spot I leave your mail is in between the shreader/trash can and the filing cabinet. This makes it very easy to open and deal with each item. It will take a maximum of five minutes a day, and will eliminate the need for the four hour sorting fest we got to do last night.

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Originally posted by blanketbat:
When I ask you to take care of it, or even offer to do it for you, do not get mad at me. When you finally get around to it, do not act like you've undertaken some herculean feat of organizational prowess.
[This message has been edited by blanketbat (edited 01-14-2005).]

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I very sneakily asked last weekend if we could do the paper trashing marathon last night. He agreed, then totally forgot. I then pulled it alllllll out and started sorting (obvious trash, keep, and shred piles) so that it was all over the place by the time he got home.