I'm starting to regret doing the whole "2nd reception" thing, as I haven't had time to even think about any arrangements for that yet. Not that the wedding is taking up that much of my time, but I've got a solid mental (and internet) checklist going and having another reception hasn't made its way on there yet.

I'm about 1/3rd of the way through addressing invites, though - *bounce*

Without trying to be rude, I just kind of want to ask.... is anyone else having a more traditional wedding? I know t_t and I are having more traditional weddings (one day apart, we're wedding twins!) but is anyone else? I'm feeling a little lost in this "plan a wedding in 6 weeks or less" craze!

Response cards continue to come in, we're up to 30 some people, but all people I knew were coming, so hopefully we still won't go over 70.

My dear friend got married on Saturday, I was his groomsmaid and had the best time. I didn't cry nearly as much as I expected to - I think it's good planning to have the attendants stand behind their friend and look at the back of their head - I think I would have broken down looking at his face during the ceremony. I got so many compliments on my dress, too! Here's a picture of me and my boys. The groom is on the right and the best man is on the left. It was a beautiful day and my shoulders are SO sunburned! So, that's my tip for people having outdoor weddings, have sunscreen available! Us girls in the weddings all had strapless dresses and got burnt to a crisp. Luckily my foundation had spf so my face isn't burnt. But, ow, my shoulders hurt!

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Originally posted by Dewgirl:
Without trying to be rude, I just kind of want to ask.... is anyone else having a more traditional wedding? I know t_t and I are having more traditional weddings (one day apart, we're wedding twins!) but is anyone else? I'm feeling a little lost in this "plan a wedding in 6 weeks or less" craze!

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why would that be rude?

In fact, I sent out my invitations three weeks ago (a little over 2 mos before the wedding) and everyone was complimenting me on being so on top of things and getting them out so early. I was like, "what? this is the only thing I've done in the 'correct' time frame." My grandmother said she can't believe how people spend over a year planning a wedding, that when she was growing up you'd have a couple of months at the most. But then, she eloped. I love my grandmother.

To give you an idea of my wedding, everyone is saying to me "ARYN! You're wearing WHITE?!?" which I think is quite funny. They're all surprised that it's going to be as traditional as it is, which is not very.

But I had this moment last weekend when I was working on the lawn at my dad's where I freaked out and decided I needed more white decorations. I want it to look like a WEDDING, not just a party at dad's, you know? I only get one of these!

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Originally posted by Aryn:

My grandmother said she can't believe how people spend over a year planning a wedding, that when she was growing up you'd have a couple of months at the most.

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I'm planning a relatively traditional wedding -- Episcopal service, in a church, formal dress etc. with some not so traditional elements... both parents are entering with both bride and groom, we're having our rehearsal dinner at a local microbrew/braut place...

Wedding are such a personal thing -- I think you have to go with what YOU are comfortable with. I love planning events so a big mostly traditional wedding is right up my alley. And I really wanted an Episcopal service - the tradition that I grew up in. But I have been to tons of friends' weddings that have been far more casual and loved those too.

If you want to chat about the stresses of planning a big, traditional wedding, feel free to email me at peelmeagrape2 AT hotmail.com.

Wedding planning has been put on the backburner while we move, but I'm looking forward to getting back into the swing of things as soon as we're in the new apartment.

Next week I have the first fitting for my dress. We'll also be getting Matt's wedding ring and he's going to go get measured for tuxes.

I have the invitations printed (I'm making them myself) so now I just have to finish cutting the vellum, stamping it, and tying it to the cardstock.

We're doing out own music for the reception, and have about three and a half hours on iTunes.

SLourdes, it's good to hear from you, I've missed you! I haven't had too much wedding stress either, but EEK! 4 months!!!

I'm really dragging on getting invitations written out - I'm about 1/3rd of the way done, but I'd wanted to be 100% done by the end of the month. That's coming up fast! We ordered his ring last week and am going to be ordering mine pretty soon.

My next goals are going to be doing a catering test (this Sat.), hiring a florist, and hiring a baker (my least favorite event that I keep putting off). I've got a tenative ceremony quartet, but I need to sit in on a rehearsal before I book them.

Okay, maybe I'm a wee bit stressed but not too much. It's going to start adding up though!

If it makes ya feel better you can say you're having an untraditional digs wedding since a lot of digsters have other types of weddings..

We all want to hear about your wedding, and the craziness associated with it and when we can, help you and/or guide you or sympatheize with you...

So my SO and I are going to have an Irish-Catholic wedding ceremony, and a Chinese wedding banquet (he's Irish, I'm Chinese). I know in the American tradition, the bride's family pays for everything, but in the Chinese tradition, the groom pays for everything.

With my little brother going to college this fall, my parents are going to be pretty cash-poor. I know that if I asked, my parents would pay for anything but I don't want to do that. And it seems like my SO's family doesn't want to chip in for anything other than their own traditions (ie, costs of the Catholic wedding ceremony, and not for Chinese banquet.) SO this whole money thing is really getting me stressed.

Anyway, yeah T and I ran into the same thing. We didn't have a huge wedding and we cut a lot of corners by doing stuff ourselves. But T's family just refused to pay for anything, at first it wasn't a problem. We were going to pay for most of it ourselves.

But when T got laid off, it became a HUGE issue. My parents got pissed because T's family wouldn't even pay for stuff that traditionally should have been their responsibility. (ie: Bride's flowers, invitations, music, ect.)

What I found helped was paying in little installments before the wedding for anything we could. It wasn't easy and my parents were able to help-out more than initially planned. (they paid for the rececption place & catering) We also cut thing out like favors and centerpieces, that I knew I didn't really want to deal with. All in all it turned out ok, we did end up getting a $2000.00 loan to cover a few thing that wouldn't allow us to pay in installments (Bastards). 9 months later, yeah we're still paying on the loan but we pay extra each month and it'll be paid off in a few months and we got the wedding we wanted.

Yeah Dewgirl for getting the invites out! I'm sure that has got to be a MAJOR relief off of your shoulders!

When my friend planned her wedding for stuff that isn't "weddingy" she didn't tell vendors that it was for a wedding (like the table flowers). I guess they were able to get away with it because a. their wedding wasn't that big and b. they did a bunch of the set up themselves the morning of. I think she was pretty happy with the way it turned out.

edited to say this is how my friend saved money, not just random information about some friend of mine and her wedding....

I realized that a few weeks ago I told ya'll I was getting married on May 29th. Shish... yeah... boy decided right before I made all the hotel reservations and the chapel reservations (I mean, my finger was on the button to send the money via credit card) that he wanted his parents at the wedding. Sigh. Ok, fine. So, I invited my parents (which pushes the date back a few months) then my parents went totally ape shit on me (when I was having a REALLY bad day anyways and they knew this... parents, taking advantage of their position... blah. Can you tell I'm still angry about this?).

Anyways, turns out that we have to invite the whole family. So, when we were going to elope, has turned into a wedding. I found a place that might work for the reception but now it's so late I don't know if I'm going to be able to get the dates we want (in August). If not, I don't know what I'm going to do because that is like the last weekend I have available before I start school and the marriage MUST happen before school or it's going to be years.

So, why am I reluctant to call the place and see if that date is available? I don't know. Maybe I'm still mad.

Even simple eloping causes problems, we've had to convince certain members of Super T's family that a Vegas wedding is actually a valid wedding and that we are IN FACT married. Its been pretty funny. Luckily we are both of the belief that if they don't want to think we're married we don't really care so much at all!

So, I called my brother and sister to tell them that I was getting married and they have 2 months to figure out how to get their little tushies down here. I guess I surprised them (umm... I've been engaged for a year. Isn't it sort of normal for engaged people to get married?) Since I "surprised" them, they think I'm pregnant. What? No... I need to get married before I start grad school. Now my whole family is going to think we're getting married because I'm pregnant (which I'm not!)

We're getting married November 6th in NJ and I live in MD, and so far our guest list is at 200+ so we're in the process of cutting people (trying to start as many fights with family as possible so i can cut them-- hahah just kidding)

Minxx- let them all think your preggo- then in 9 months when there is no baby they will all feel silly.

Don't you just hate all the drama surrounding weddings? My sister is getting married in 3 weeks - she has turned into Bridezilla and I don't even know who she is anymore. She used to be so chill and laid back and now it is "wedding this" or "wedding that".

I wish that weddings could be about the actual couple and the fact that they're inviting you to share something so important in their lives- instead people are worried about whether or not there is going to be filet mignon and shrimp and who they are going to be sitting with at the table- ugh!

okay i have a similar situation my family and his are large(his mom is from a family of 11)!yikes!so, immediate fam-aunts uncles ,1st cousins comprise about 200 people and we have a shitload friends and alot of others who are important to us(watched us grow up etc.) so we are guessing about 400 ppl.aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
who can afford this? we talked about destination wedding vs. trad wedding. obviously dest. would be more cost effective , but i really think i'll regret not walking down the aisle, and i absolutely have fantasized about the big ridiculous wedding since i was a kid, but the $$$ factor is just crushing my little dream

p.s. i am extremely crafty and plan on making most things myself also,we have good friends in every aspect of wedding stuff(dress/band/photographer/his parents own a nice restaraunt) and it will still cost an arm and a leg! what do ya do??

Are your guests drinkers? I can't even begin to imagine how much it would cost to get 400 people drunk. If you're planning on having alcohol at the reception, that's one place you could look at cutting costs, (i.e. limiting the amount of alcohol you're going to have to pay for.)

I went with a traditonal wedding because i felt you you do- i would regret not walking down the aisle- i think there are def. ways to cut it back to a reasonable cost- it depends on the cost of weddings in your are. i think wedding prices are regional- for example i have cousins in maryland who can have a wedding for $60 a head, whereas in New York or NJ you couldnt even come close to a wedding at $60/head- its more in the $100-300 /head range.

certainly there are venues that are higher or lower and there are totally ways to bring the cost down (ie- doing your own flowers for example a dozen roses from a florist is about $50 arranged into a centerpiece.. but Sams and Walmart you can order roses for under $20/ dozen!!!)

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Originally posted by tags:
divine.. 400 PEOPLE!!!! i dont think that combined M & I KNOW 400 People!

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I don't think I know 400 people also!! Wow. I'm loosing sleep over planning for 15 people and my mom is driving me crazy and she lives 1200 miles away! Argh! You are a strong woman, that's for sure! Remember, if you need a ear to rant, we're here!!

On my wedding front: I bought my dress!! It's a simple pink and white floral sundress from @nne Taylor. Boy helped me pick it out. Eee... I'm feeling like a girl!