so when he asked, i was completely shocked and i couldn't imagine NOT being married to him. so, of course, i said yes.

I found out that Alan had this in mind actually several months ago, when I flat out asked him what kind of a time frame we were on. It's important to me in a relationship to know if the person ever wants to be married, wants it but not for 10 years, or wants it next week. So, several months ago when I asked him what he thought about marriage, he told me that he was looking at this summer.

For me, I'm glad I know. For one, it's helped me put aside some major insecurities I have about him picking up and leaving me (not that he still couldn't, but I know it's not in his mind to do so), or about the status of our relationship. Without some kind of 'map' I think I would be questioning how serious he was about us, etc.

Not to mention, I HATE suprises (well, big suprises. I like little suprises like flowers when they're not expected, things like that). I like to be prepared for everything. So while I don't want to know the actual date or what he plans to do to propose, I would be really uncomfortable (yet still happy!) if he had done it out of the blue without me having any idea he was thinking about it. though honey, if you read this... I'm ready! Any day! Any time! I'll say yes!

I've always said I didn't want to just talk and all of a sudden become engaged. I know lots of people who just mutually agreed, we should become engaged, and then went to the jewlery store and picked out a ring. That doesn't appeal to me very much-- it seems too practical. I really want the whole romantic, down on one knee, surprise thing.

Matt can't keep a secret, so I pretty much know it's going to be next month. But that doesn't bother me too much, because I am really excited knowing he's getting ready for it! And we've decided not to talk about it again, because he's afraid he'll reveal too much and I won't be at all surprised.

And it would be very cool to all be planning a wedding at the same time! I'd love to have a few digsters for support!

I don't know exactly when it will happen, we don't have any anniverseries or celebrations coming up, so that wouldn't be it, my birthday has already passed so that wouldn't be it either. In reality I am not anticipating it at every move and think I will be surprised and overjoyed whenever it happens. I am also fully aware that something may come up in the meantime that delays it and I'm okay with that as well. For now I am satisfied that he wants to, and feels confident enough about it that he talked to his friend about it!

BF and I have been together for ages, have been living together for nearly a year and a half, so I think it would have been odd if he'd just launched it on me by surprise. Particularly as we're more concerned about the practical aspects of being married (tax, insurance, he can get an Aussie passport, I can become a HK permanent resident) than the romantic ones. We talk about all aspects of our future, from where we'll go for our next holiday to what car we'll get when our current one dies. Marriage is really just another one of these things. And of course an excuse to get a great big f-off piece of jewellery.

It was in the news a few weeks ago that Lichtenstein has passed a law enabling the whole country to be hired out for corporate functions. Now he wants to rent Lichtenstein for the ceremony and reception. I was thinking the altogether more modest Hong Kong Cricket Club, but I could certainly be persuaded if we won the lottery. Wouldn't it be cool to have every building in the whole country flying a flag that said "Congratulations Sophie and BF"?

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Originally posted by Sophie:
It was in the news a few weeks ago that Lichtenstein has passed a law enabling the whole country to be hired out for corporate functions.

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Originally posted by Sophie:
200 shirts printed with "I went to B__ and Sophie's wedding, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt".

I have agreed on condition that on the back of each shirt is printed the photo I took in Cambodia of him squatting over a fresh elephant poo as if he'd just relieved himself after a very, very large and fibrous meal.

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Registering is FUN!! And even though it's an ettiquitte faux-pas, I completely plan on putting the little slips from each of the stores that say, "We registered here" in the save the date envelopes, or out of town guest info packets. I mean, come on-- How ELSE are they going to find out?

Edited to add:
Wow, I reread that, and I completely sounded like a present-hungry bimbette. I'm not. Trust me. We registered at both so there was a price difference. Also, because my relatives would probably go for Kaufmann's, while our friends would go for Target-- budget wise.

We ended up getting lots of duplicate gifts from the Pier One list - and I'm not quite sure why. But they give you store credit on returns and I just got a coupon for 20% off coupon for anything left on our list or anything we want from the store. BB&B also gives you 10% off - but only for the items left on your list.

A word of advice when registering: check the store's return policy. I know Target has really cracked down on their exchange policy. You can only return items in exchange for other items in the same department. That could get kind of tricky if for instance, you end up with a ton of houseware stuff when really you need electronic stuff.

Our registry was on my shower invitations, but not the wedding invitation. I found that people generally asked when RSVPing - or asked my maid of honor.

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Originally posted by suzette:
I know Target has really cracked down on their exchange policy. You can only return items in exchange for other items in the same department. That could get kind of tricky if for instance, you end up with a ton of houseware stuff when really you need electronic stuff.

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Originally posted by BionicGirl:
Weird. That hasn't been the case with my baby registry. It seems pretty open for stuff that you have a gift receipt for they just give you a gift card for that amount. For stuff w/o a receipt the give you an in-store voucher. But you can spend both either way you like. I returned some stuff earlier this week from the baby department; then I got a few baby things, a bunch of film, and some toiletries (for my hospital bag).

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That's good to know. There was a huge stink about their new policy several months ago. 7 On Your Side did a story about it. Maybe they changed it again?

What kind of things did you register for? Al and I were discussing this the other day, and realized that between living together, and both living on our own for a few years... there's not much we really need. Sure, you can always upgrade your china and other kitchenwares... but other than that... there's not much we could think of.

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Originally posted by Dewgirl:
For those of you who got married after you lived together...

What kind of things did you register for? Al and I were discussing this the other day, and realized that between living together, and both living on our own for a few years... there's not much we really need. Sure, you can always upgrade your china and other kitchenwares... but other than that... there's not much we could think of.

Do you think it's acceptable to register for more general things? ie. movies, board games, etc.

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hubby and i had a ton of stuff between the two of us even before registering -- 2 full sets of pots/pans, dinner plates, cups, etc.

we registered for some high-quality knives (japanese chef's, paring, boning, serated), some new kitchen gadgets (like a pizza cutter, garlic masher-type stuff, also a juicer, kitchenaid), and upgraded our highballs to nice ones.

i now wish that we had gotten some matching table settings, or even things like sheets/comforter covers/towels. your board game/movie idea sounds good to me!