| Q:
Is it good etiquette to bring a gift when invited to dinner at
the host’s new home? —Rene'
A:
Barring situations where
"gift" is a polite euphemism for "bribery"
– in which case, of course, a gift is a very bad idea in terms
of propriety, the whole illegal aspect generally being frowned
upon by most etiquette mavens -- a thoughtful present is pretty
much always a good thing. I doubt there’s been a single host
in all of history who ever thought poorly of a guest because
said guest arrived at a party with a small token in hand. These
days, the housewarming gift is becoming less and less common an
occurrence, in my experience — even at gatherings which are
explicitly advertised as housewarming parties— which means
that few people I know actually expect friends to gift them with
anything just because they’ve moved into a new home. So if you’re
asking whether a gift is required, the answer is a big ol’
nope, especially given the fact that it’s a dinner party you’re
attending, not a housewarming per se. On the other hand, if you
arrive at your dinner party with a little something to help the
host break in the new digs -- an easy-to-care-for plant in an
attractive container is a good, traditional gift, a bottle of
wine a good choice for just about any occasion – your gift
will no doubt be much appreciated by the host, and its
thoughtfulness duly noted.
2 roomies
for the price of 1 ...
Q:
Hi--I'm writing because for the last two months, I've been
getting two roommates for the price of one (this month I
demanded that #3--my roommate's boyfriend--start paying 1/3 of
the rent, which they thought was unfair but did anyway).
Anyway, while I'm glad he's finally not mooching off of
us/me, I'm still highly annoyed by the situation.
I am the original tenant in a two-bedroom and had advertised
for 1 female roommate. The girl I ended up offering the place to
did not tell me until she came to pick up the key (after the
lease was already signed) that her mate was part of the bargain.
She said it would be temporary...but it certainly doesn't feel
that way now that we're in October (and she moved in at the
beginning of August).
Anyway, it came to my attention via my landlord that we are
violating the terms of the lease, which says no more than 2
residents in the apartment (he called to find out why the guy
was always in the building without her). So he's serving us with
a cease or vacate notice TODAY...and I couldn't be more pleased.
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