I'm 21 years
old and have been invited to the first wedding of my adult life,
and I think I have committed a major wedding mistake.
I recently received an invitation to a friend’s
wedding, and RSVP'd, indicating that I would be
attending with a guest, a new boyfriend of mine.
However, after I mailed the letter I started thinking
that maybe I shouldn't have assumed that I could bring a guest,
let alone one who the couple getting married does not know.
asked my mother and she said that I probably shouldn't have done
that, but I should ask the couple getting married if it would be
alright to bring a guest, explaining to them that I don't know
anything about being a proper guest.
They said it was fine to bring a guest...but of course
they are going to say it. At
this point it would be rude not to.
getting their permission I still do not feel any better about
inviting a potentially unwanted guest.
How can I remedy this situation?
Should I still bring my boyfriend?
Or should I go solo like I was supposed to in the first
place? And if so,
how do I nicely uninvite my boyfriend?
Will I be the only one there who brought an uninvited
guest? I need
wedding is June 21st. Please
give me advice before then.
the love of blunders,
that is a quandary. At this point, you’ve made your little
etiquette faux-pas, and realized it, unfortunately just a tad
too late. Such things happen to most of us at one point in our
lives or another, so don’t beat yourself up too much more over
the oops. Yes, you rather unfortunately, and obviously
unintentionally, committed an etiquette breach when you replied
to their initial invitation. And you subsequently put your
friends into a bit of a pickle when you asked them whether it
would be okay to bring a guest to their wedding; obviously, in
hindsight, you no doubt realize it might have been better to
apologize and then let them know you wouldn’t be bringing the
boyfriend after all. But given the fact that your friends have
already said it’s fine, I’d take their word that they really
meant it when they said they’d be okay with you bringing your
new boyfriend. It would in all likelihood be more irritating to
them if, at this point in time, so close to the wedding, you
suddenly called them up yet again to let them know that you’ve
changed your mind about bringing a guest. They’ve no doubt
already dealt with the little hassle of factoring in the extra
guest to their plans, and have moved on to stressing out about a
billion other things by now. The less you contribute to the
last-minute chaos, the better. So go to the wedding, bring your
boy with you as well, and help your friends celebrate their
happy day. And definitely, definitely, definitely make sure that
you and your boyfriend send them a really, really nice
gift along with a thoughtful card, and preferably right away.
on moseying for more questions tackled